Artists are one of the most complex groups of people. They are enlightened beings who use their power of observation of the world to bring light to their experiences.
As an observer, we must be open. We feel all the emotions of others. We pay attention to everything in a way that most people would not understand. The brain of an artist is always hyperactive. We are always creating no matter if we have a paintbrush in hand or not. Half of our work is experiencing thinking, questioning, and processing our lives. The other half is being able to communicate those thoughts visually for others to understand.
With our minds always working, we rarely let experience rest. This leads to hints of neuroticism in our personality. More specifically, anxiety.
Every artist I know including myself has some form of anxiety. Sometimes we even use our anxiety as a tool for our creativity. Many believe that only good art comes from experiencing death, and trauma. While that is somewhat true, we also draw from life and miracles. We are the communicators of balance. Our work makes us go on journeys to find the good from the bad. If we only experience bad things, then we find joy in our process of creating . We live to create.
My creativity came in during my childhood as a form of survival. Creativity was a necessity to solve my problems.
As a child it allowed me to escape my reality of pain and abuse and form my world of comfort. Now, my creativity has evolved from my enlightenment. I use it to question and better my reality rather than escape it.
I live through my art, and I would not be who I am today without it.
It starts with a word, a question, a scent, or a feeling. The thought grabs my mind and brands it.
I then investigate that thought which leads me to hints and clues of the bigger picture I am trying to grasp.
I sit with my feelings and take notes of how I respond to them. Does it make sense? Does this relate to that? How can I display this concept? What materials mimic my words? These are just a few questions that I ask myself daily. I do not stop asking questions until I am satisfied and make sense of my answer.
If my answers are not fulfilling I get anxious. My mind tends to be in a state of negotiation about truth and reality. From this, I can get burnt out from myself.
I have to have discernment over which thought I investigate, or it could negatively impact my mental space.
If I don’t act on a thought, It can disappear just as quickly as it comes. This can make it hard to not allow yourself to work.
Will that thought ever come back, will I ever have another genius idea again?
It can send you into deep contemplation. With all the positives and negatives of having a creative personality.
I would not have it any other way. As it is my hell, it is also my heaven. I would not survive without it, and many artists will tell you the same.
Rylee Mckenzie is a multifaceted fine-arts artist from Yellow Springs, Ohio. She is currently based in New York and pursuing a BFA in drawing at Pratt Institute. She primarily focuses on drawing, painting, photography and hopes to get into the world of fashion design and ceramics as well. Rylee’s work primarily focuses on the investigation of humans and the world around us. She also loves to travel in nature, read, and being a caregiver in assisted living. To see more of her work , visit @l0ve6ug and @l0ve6ug.jpeg on Instagram.