Where Does Creativity Hide?

On May 16, 2023May 13, 2023 By kmcken17prattIn Creative Arts, Personal GrowthLeave a comment

Artists are one of the most complex groups of people. They are enlightened beings who use their power of observation of the world to bring light to their experiences.

As an observer, we must be open. We feel all the emotions of others. We pay attention to everything in a way that most people would not understand. The brain of an artist is always hyperactive. We are always creating no matter if we have a paintbrush in hand or not. Half of our work is experiencing thinking, questioning, and processing our lives. The other half is being able to communicate those thoughts visually for others to understand.

With our minds always working, we rarely let experience rest. This leads to hints of neuroticism in our personality. More specifically, anxiety.

Every artist I know including myself has some form of anxiety. Sometimes we even use our anxiety as a tool for our creativity. Many believe that only good art comes from experiencing death, and trauma. While that is somewhat true, we also draw from life and miracles. We are the communicators of balance. Our work makes us go on journeys to find the good from the bad. If we only experience bad things, then we find joy in our process of creating . We live to create.

My creativity came in during my childhood as a form of survival. Creativity was a necessity to solve my problems.

As a child it allowed me to escape my reality of pain and abuse and form my world of comfort. Now, my creativity has evolved from my enlightenment. I use it to question and better my reality rather than escape it.

I live through my art, and I would not be who I am today without it.

It starts with a word, a question, a scent, or a feeling. The thought grabs my mind and brands it.

I then investigate that thought which leads me to hints and clues of the bigger picture I am trying to grasp.

I sit with my feelings and take notes of how I respond to them. Does it make sense? Does this relate to that? How can I display this concept? What materials mimic my words? These are just a few questions that I ask myself daily. I do not stop asking questions until I am satisfied and make sense of my answer.

If my answers are not fulfilling I get anxious. My mind tends to be in a state of negotiation about truth and reality. From this, I can get burnt out from myself.

I have to have discernment over which thought I investigate, or it could negatively impact my mental space.

If I don’t act on a thought, It can disappear just as quickly as it comes. This can make it hard to not allow yourself to work.

Will that thought ever come back, will I ever have another genius idea again?

It can send you into deep contemplation. With all the positives and negatives of having a creative personality.

I would not have it any other way. As it is my hell, it is also my heaven. I would not survive without it, and many artists will tell you the same.

Rylee’s Bio

Rylee Mckenzie is a multifaceted fine-arts artist from Yellow Springs, Ohio. She is currently based in New York and pursuing a BFA in drawing at Pratt Institute. She primarily focuses on drawing, painting, photography and hopes to get into the world of fashion design and ceramics as well. Rylee’s work primarily focuses on the investigation of humans and the world around us. She also loves to travel in nature, read, and being a caregiver in assisted living. To see more of her work , visit @l0ve6ug and @l0ve6ug.jpeg on Instagram.

Red Letter Days

On March 1, 2023March 2, 2023 By Pat and DaveIn Personal Growth, The Story Continues1 Comment

Reflections about grief and loss 20 years following the transition of my daughter Jeannine from this world

by Dave Roberts

My sincere thanks to all who have supported me on a path that I never, in my wildest dreams, thought I would ever be walking. In particular I am grateful for the presence of Reverend Patty Furino my dearest friend,colleague and mentor whose guidance helped me embrace new perspectives that allowed me to find peace with my daughter’s transition.

Jeannine age 16

Red letter days are defined as “ memorably important or happy occasions.” March 1, 2003 would not qualify as a memorably happy occasion by any stretch of the imagination. At 12:30 am my 18-year-old daughter Jeannine transitioned into a new existence following a 10-month battle with alveolar rhabdomyosarcoma, a rare and incurable connective muscle tissue cancer. She left behind her mother Cheri, her brothers Dan and Matt, and a daughter Brianna. Brianna is an almost 21-year-old mother to a two-year-old daughter, Teagan Marie, who shares a middle name with her grandmother Jeannine.

March 1 turned out to be a memorably important occasion however, as this marked the beginning of my own transition to a perspective empowering me to continue the relationship with my daughter in the purest of forms. As a result, I experienced a renewed desire to re-engage in life and be of service to others experiencing life altering challenges. This transformation did not occur without challenge, however.

Approximately two and a half years into my grief, I grew weary living in a world without my daughter’s physical presence. I wanted God or their representative to come down from the Great Beyond with Jeannine, telling me that we made a mistake and are giving you your daughter back, your life back. However, the universe met my repeated requests for the intact life I once had with deafening silence. Besides it was continually frustrating and emotionally draining to wish for something that I could no longer have. So prior to the completion of year three of my grief journey, I decided to embrace my identity as a parent who experienced the unthinkable, rather than reject it.

March 1,2023 will be 20 years since Jeannine was part of the physical world. I still have moments, days when I am transported to the early days of grief, where the pain is raw and as suffocating as a suit two sizes too small for me.

Today, I have learned to sit with whatever emotion makes its presence known , because ultimately it will teach me something about myself, or minimally reinforce the resilience that I have had to develop in the face of catastrophic and untenable circumstances.

Every angelversary I have experienced usually reveals one revelation about myself or my grief journey previously unknown to me. This year has been different, in that no one profound teaching has manifested. In light of this development or non-development, I decided to take inventory of some of what I have discovered during the past 20 years of life without Jeannine. Here they are, in no particular order of importance. I hope many of these resonate:

There is a lot to be said for the will to survive in early grief, particularly during the second year, which is more challenging than the first, for many of us.

Happiness by itself doesn’t add up to fulfillment. Fulfillment for me ,is being able to authentically express the totality of my emotions at any time. l discovered the importance of having a support group who embrace wholeness and authenticity, and who are not intimidated by my grief or my refusal to be happy all the time.

We can empower ourselves to re-engage in life with purpose and meaning in honor of and with our transitioned loved ones, or we can withdraw from life, never desiring to move beyond the prison walls created by the enormity and weight of our grief. Catastrophic loss can rob us of much but can never take away our free will.

It is ok to feel as though you are stumbling through the darkness of grief. Stumbling is movement, which is better than permanently sloshing around in the quagmire of grief.

I realize that my bad days can teach me as much about my grief as the good ones. Everything and everybody are in service to my continued growth in the human experience and for the evolution of my soul.

We can always find hope and light amidst the darkness of grief. When darkness envelops me, I take comfort from this teaching from The Afterlife of Billy Fingers by Annie Kagan:

When life is joyous, the light will be there. When there is hardship the light will also be there.

I have discovered that any act of love towards our fellow human being, is an act of self-love and perhaps even self- forgiveness for the things we thought we should have seen or should have been to our deceased loved ones.

I am not the person I once was 20 years ago. In fact, I would need a search party to find the person that I was prior to Jeannine’s illness and transition. If I had no desire to evolve, I would have been permanently stuck in the abyss of grief, with no desire or path to move forward.

I have integrated spirituality with my core science beliefs. Belief expansion has empowered me to look at life and death differently. I will commit to belief expansion until the day of my transition. I still have plenty to learn.

From my perspective, acceptance involves in part, a willingness to create continued bonds with our transitioned loved ones. Establishing continued bonds with Jeannine empowered me to find peace with her transition and to reinvest in life with meaning and purpose.

Any kind of trauma changes who we are, at any age. The more we can embrace those changes, the more empowered we become; the more resilience we develop.

I can live a human experience while embracing continued spiritual growth and completely re-engaging with all the world has to offer. During early grief, I may have considered this point of view as disrespectful to the memory of my daughter. Now I view total re engagement in life as another way to honor the legacy Jeannine has left for me to carry.

It is at times surreal that I have survived and thrived following the transition of my daughter, for two full decades. In fact, I have walked the path of a parent who has experienced the death of a child, longer than some of my undergraduate students have lived. That among other things, also adds to the intermittent surrealness of the last two decades of my life.

As mentioned previously ,I am not the person I was 20 years ago. I believe I have become more compassionate, open and present for my family and those who need support in trying times. I have mentioned in some of my other writings that I wish it took something less drastic than my daughter’s illness and transition to facilitate my metamorphosis . However, what I have learned is that we have no control over the challenges we will encounter in our life. All we can control is how we transform and transcend them.

It’s… Death that gives the world its point

From The Twilight Zone episode Long Live Walter Jameson

Contributors Wanted For “The Story Continues”

On January 19, 2023January 16, 2023 By Pat and DaveIn The Story ContinuesLeave a comment

Through our personal stories, we can discover a new understanding of the past, while creating the present that we desire.
When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister

After Reverend Patty Furino and I co-authored and published the book When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister, on Amazon on March 1, 2021, we decided to develop a companion website as well with a blog. Our blog, “The Story Continues” started out as a place where Patty and I could continue to share our reflections based on our ongoing conversations, when inspired to do so. However, “The Story Continues,” has become a place for other contributors young and older alike to share their life narratives and reflections. As we are firm believers in going where the universe guides us, we want to invite others who so desire to share their stories with us. Here are our submission guidelines:

Submissions will be edited for spelling, grammar, and format. Your content will never be altered. Before we publish your work, we will send any suggested edits for your final approval.
Submissions can be, but not limited to topics such as: critical thinking, integration of grief, ancestral healing, how you develop continued bonds with your loved ones, integration of psychology and spirituality, or how When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister impacted you.
All submissions should include a featured image. If it is your own, let us know. If it is coming from another source, please make sure it is properly credited.
Our goal is to give you feedback on your submissions within 24-72 hours. If you have a specific publication date and time in mind, please let us know. Otherwise, we will schedule a publication date accordingly.

Please email your initial submission to: psychologyprofessorandminister@gmail.com Please spell and grammar check your work prior to emailing us. Though we provide editing suggestions, our response time will be faster if you do some preliminary due diligence.

After we receive your first article submission, we will give you the option of becoming a regular contributor to “The Story “Continues” blog:

Once you are approved to become a regular contributor, you can upload your content to”The Story Continues” and edit it as well.
As regular contributors, you can submit as often(or as little) as you like. We want your work to be your original best.

We look forward to hearing from you and providing you an opportunity to share your thoughts with our subscribers and your support network. Wishing you peace.

Dave Roberts and Reverend Patty Furino

The Past As A Teacher

On December 27, 2022December 27, 2022 By caisseykIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

©Kathleen Spatuzzi Photography, Used with Permission

Editor’s Reflections

The Past As A Teacher is Kierra Caissey’s first contribution to The Story Continues blog. Kierra was another one of my best and brightest students and like Kali Regan( another of our contributors), in the top 1% of my students at Utica University. Her piece particularly resonates with me because of my affinity for the teachings of crow. Jamie Sams and David Carson speak of the teachings of crow in their book, Medicine Cards:

Honor the past as your teacher, honor the present as your creation, and honor the future as your inspiration.

Kierra not only teaches us that we are never too young or old to reflect on the teachings of our past, but that we can learn to make room for perspectives we can incorporate in addition to our core beliefs. She also eloquently reminds us that we need to make room for experiences that are not readily explained through science, but nonetheless real to those who experience them. In the process, she explains how integrating different perspectives helped her transform the relationship with her late grandmother.

Because Dave was one of my favorite professors at Utica College, it is of no surprise to me that When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister found its way to the top of my list of favorite books. As a student in Dave’s classes, many of the stories he shared in the book are even more touching when heard in real time. Many of the lessons he covered in his classes were always enjoyable, but the lessons he encourages his students to learn often transcend past the classroom and into a plethora of areas within their lives – I can personally attest to this.

Dave’s humility and openness to experiencing the world around us for all that it is – even when things cannot be easily explained – not only made him a professor I deeply admired but a friend and colleague I cherish. Patty was a guest lecturer in one of my classes with Dave and I still remember how scrunched up my face and how furrowed my eyebrows were as she discussed her journey as a minister and her spiritual relation with the afterlife. Dave is incredibly perceptive and after the lecture finished, he engaged me in a conversation about how questioning everything around us, the unknown, and being open to what varying perspectives can offer us can be gratifying. Being fortunate to have gotten to read Dave and Patty’s book a couple years later, I see the stories they once shared in the classroom with my peers – and all of their newly discussed stories, with fresh eyes (and less brow furrowing).

Much like Dave discusses, the field of psychology calls for evidentiary support for any claim, to be concrete in one’s approach, and to justify thoughts, emotions, and behavior in scientific ways. I often furrowed my eyebrows and grit my teeth against Patty and Dave’s lessons in undergrad, likely for a few reasons, but mainly because I had to recognize how uncomfortable it can be to experience things that are ostensibly unexplainable by science and fact, even though they are not necessarily coincidences, either. Trying to find a balance between science and spirituality can be difficult. I feel grateful for Patty and Dave who challenge the status quo by integrating more than one perspective into their lives when facing grief, relationships, and the overall human experience.

One of the greatest lessons Dave has taught me is how the past can be one of our greatest teachers; reflection is powerful. Looking back almost three years later on the lecture Patty gave our Death, Dying, and Bereavement class, I have a great appreciation for the strength that lies within her vulnerability to have shared her intimate experiences with us as someone who supports families and friends in their grieving processes. I was inspired to delve further into my own grieving experience after reading When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister.

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Nana’s Cardinal Sign

As a result of Dave and Patty’s book, I developed a greater appreciation for the signs from my own deceased loved ones; I stopped over-analyzing every experience and began appreciating the comfort in knowing that love has minimal (if any) barriers, if we choose to accept such a concept. Every cardinal that lands on the sun porch while my mother and I share morning coffee together (the way we used to when my late grandmother was around – my grandmother’s favorite bird), seeing “Nana” coffee mugs decorated with cardinals at the grocery store near my favorite snack aisle, or hearing her favorite song on the radio in the car reminds me I am still enveloped by the love we shared as nana and granddaughter, years after her passing. The beauty of Dave and Patty’s book is that they encourage their readers to dig deeper into their beliefs and to reflect with intention about what their successes, shortcomings, and connections to people can teach them. I have felt more empowered in my grieving process as a result of allowing myself to see the signs around me and feel comfort and solace as a result; even if I am the one assigning the meaning of each sign. Being able to choose my path during my grieving process has made me a stronger and more sentimental friend, daughter, granddaughter, and person.

The freedom one can gain from using the past as one’s teacher finds me now as I write this blog submission, knowing that so much of my grief experience and life path of my own has been made more peaceful from Dave’s presence in my life as a mentor, and from his and Patty’s experiences shared in When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister.

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Kierra’s Bio

Kierra Caissey attended Utica College, graduating in 2021 with a Bachelor’s in Psychology and a minor in Health Ethics. In between research projects and serving as a member of the Student Athlete Advisory Committee (SAAC), Kierra was a 4-year member of the Utica College women’s soccer team. Kierra now serves her local community as a residential counselor for Open Sky Community Services, using the skills she gained in undergrad from her classes and mentors to teach adults with various mental or physical health conditions how to lead fuller, healthier, and more confident lives. When she’s not working as a counselor, Kierra can be found coaching soccer for the FC Stars soccer club, where she gets the greatest joy and fulfillment through sharing her love and knowledge of the game with the next generation of kids in her area. She draws strength from her close friendships, her parents, and her best friend (dog) Rocky. She hopes that through her career in mental health and coaching that she can leave the places she gives her time to even better than they were when she found them.

Black and White Thinking

On December 19, 2022January 10, 2023 By kalireganIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

Editor’s Reflections

The following piece is authored by one of my best and brightest students, I have had the pleasure of working with during my 19 plus years at Utica University. Her stepfather John had asked that I meet with her as an incoming transfer student to provide some advice or guidance. Upon meeting Kali Regan, she presented me with her two-year plan to obtain her undergraduate degree in psychology. To say that I was impressed with her intelligence and analytical and critical thinking skills, would be an understatement. To date, she is in the top 1% of students I have taught at the undergraduate level. I am humbled that she acknowledged the impact she perceives I had on her and her perceptions of life, death and life after death. The impact that she and my other students have had on me has been profound. Within every student, is a great teacher. Enjoy the reflections in Kali Regan’s first published article titled, Black and White Thinking. Dave Roberts

Kali’s father Denny Regan

Dave Roberts could not have said it better when he said, “We don’t meet people by chance, that they are meant to come into our lives for a reason.”

My stepfather, John, always had a way of carefully placing what I needed right in front of me for me to take advantage of if I deemed it fit and necessary, as he knew there was a reason I needed to talk with Dave. When John introduced me to Dave, I think instantly he felt like family to me. I was quickly drawn to Dave’s style of writing, his love for life and his work, and incredibly fascinated with his perspective of grief and loss.

I, too, had encountered a great deal of loss. Spring break of my 7th grade year of middle school, I lost my father after a battle with epilepsy, after he suffered from a grand mal seizure. Losing my father at 12 years old put this weight on me that I could not bear.

I could not embrace that my life was imperfect causing so much dissonance impacting my psyche and beliefs every day. Every issue that ever came up just made me long for connection with my father and I did not know how. I spent a lot of time in the decade following questioning my thoughts and beliefs toward religion, spirituality, and any possible way I could connect with my dad. I just always thought; how could I possibly make sense of the tragedy I endured?

Shortly after meeting Dave, I reflected on my own journey with grief thus far. I shoved everything deep down so much that it was radiating from my aura and knew Dave could sense the pressure I put on myself to control the world around me because I could not control the pain I felt from the tragedy I endured.

My father was gone from me physically, and that to me meant he was gone from every aspect of life. I was afraid of people forgetting about him, that I would forget about him. As I delved deeper into the story of Dave losing his daughter, Jeannine, I had a more intricate understanding of his journey after the fact. Through this, I was able to indulge in a reformed way of thinking about grief, and how to live your life after losing one of the most important people in it.

Throughout my time knowing Dave, I often find myself writing down quotes he says to me, or I read that I wanted to remember. In a piece he once wrote, he said, “the tapestry of beauty is woven from the fabric of tragedy.” From there, I knew my connection with my father could only be furthered, and knew the importance of my loss, both positive and negative impacts it had on me.

The ability to self-reflect and integrate a number of perspectives and means of connection into my ever changing beliefs allows me each day to gain more clarity in a world where that does not come easy. Dave was the first person I knew who endured pure tragedy and loss, and channeled that toward bettering himself and developing a greater cognizance of the universe.

When Reverend Patty Furino and Dave collaborated and shared their story it sounded all too familiar. The influence Patty had in Dave’s life has created a rolling effect. As Patty opened Dave’s eyes amongst many others to a new worldview, Dave did the same to me. By sharing their story through When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister, the magnitude of their impact on how others grieve and connect will be infinite. To be guided by Dave, Patty, and their experiences is to transition beyond your experiences —to be empowered.

I mentioned how my stepfather John always had a way of giving me opportunities to explore the world and form my own beliefs (if I so chose). The world today and everyday always needs more tolerance and acceptance, allowing us to understand the beliefs of others while constantly developing our own.

Today, and everyday black and white thinking can only exist amongst a plentiful array of grays. Death does not have to mean someone is entirely gone from us in any sense, just our medium of communication must shift. Connection can exist in a myriad of ways if we allow ourselves to explore outside the norm.

Kali’s Bio

Kali is a Utica University, formerly Utica College alumni with her Bachelors in Psychology, living in Raleigh, North Carolina. Her passion for mental health advocacy along with neuroscience drove her to a career in alternative medicine, specifically neurofeedback therapy. As the executive director of MyBrain DR, Kali empowers others in recovery to think beyond the traditional expectations of mental health care. She is nothing without her other half, rescue pup London, and her love for spending time traveling to visit family and friends all over.

How An Interfaith Minister Empowered Me To Be The Co-Creator With Spirit of My Life Story

On October 21, 2021October 25, 2021 By Pat and DaveIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

by Judy Parker

Reverend Patty Furino was one of the first neighbors I met after moving to an apartment in Rock Hill, South Carolina, close to my daughter. Other than my daughter I knew no one in Rock Hill. Patty’s kind words of encouragement as she walked her dog Coba past my patio meant a lot. From our initial encounter Patty’s deep genuineness and care for others was apparent. Within a couple weeks after meeting Patty I lost my beloved rescue Sophie. The support Patty gave me (along with loaning her sweet Coba to me on multiple occasions) confirmed my first impression of her. She has now become a very important part of my life.

I honestly don’t know how I would have made it through the last 5 months without the emotional support Reverend Patty Furino has given me. Between dealing with the loss of my beloved dog Sophie on 2/15/21 after 12 years as my sole companion, transitioning to life in a new city far from my remaining nine siblings, and developing a new and healthier relationship with my grown daughter, it has been a challenging time to say the least.

Among many things Patty has taught me is that if I don’t take care of myself, I won’t be able to take care of anyone else. Thanks to Patty I am learning to listen to my own heart and to focus some attention on what Judy needs. I no longer rush to anybody I perceived as needing my help; to some it may sound selfish, but I have discovered that self-care is essential to my peace of mind. She has helped me see that being still is a wonderful gift we can give ourselves ,without feeling guilty. I have experienced first-hand the benefit of Patty’s advice to meditate and listen for guidance before making a major decision.

With Patty’s mentoring my whole attitude is changing to a more positive one. More than ever before I see that the way I look at life greatly affects my experience. As Patty likes to say, I am the co-creator with spirit of my own life story. So with that in mind, I work daily on keeping my thoughts more positive because I now believe that our thoughts affect our reality. I have always enjoyed helping others, but Patty has helped me realize that sometimes you need to help them help themselves. It is tough not doing what your loved ones expect but sometimes it is better in the long run to empower them to find their own truth. Patty is teaching me to be cognizant of my impact on everyone with whom I interact including the lady at Walmart, the waitress, the store clerk, the guy at the park and not just on my loved ones. She is helping me see that by walking with awareness, together we can create a better world one small step at a time.

About The Writer

Judy Parker was born on July 30,1951 in rural Williamsburg County, South Carolina. As a middle child of 11 in a farming family she learned at an early age what hard work really meant. Judy attended Winthrop College, in Rock Hill, South Carolina from August 1969 until December 1970, after which time she transferred to the University of South Carolina(USC) in Columbia. Judy earned a Bachelor of Science in Education (mathematics) in 1974 and a Master of Mathematics in 1977 from USC.

Judy’s first career was as a mathematics teacher at junior and senior high schools in Columbia ,South Carolina from August 1977 until January 1983. After teaching, she transitioned to the field of Information Technologies. From January 1983 until her retirement in May 2013, her positions included: insurance and real estate computer systems installation and troubleshooting, data systems analyst, instructor of insurance principles ,system software, and computer systems problem management. She enjoyed her career and found immense satisfaction in her work.

She is divorced and the mother of one 34-year-old daughter. After retirement, Judy had a little difficulty in figuring out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. Because of her passion for the outdoors, she quickly decided to use her free time to hike in state and national parks. Judy is currently exploring the idea of buying an RV and “traveling this grand land of ours. “

Walking in Awareness

On August 16, 2021August 12, 2021 By Pat and DaveIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

by Yvonne Johansen

Me and my mom Rita during our younger years and again in 2018

On October 29, 2012, Hurricane Sandy battered the East Coast with record-setting flooding and devastating winds. My 90-year-old mother was left without power. Scared and alone in her apartment on Long Island she contacted me in California. Miraculously, her phone still worked. Not knowing how to help her or what to do, my husband suggested calling the Red Cross. And we did. An angel answered the phone, her name, Patty Furino.

That phone call changed my life forever. Not only did Patty help get my mom scheduled deliveries for food in the weeks to follow, but she also helped me problem-solve by finding her a warm place to stay until her power was restored.

To say that Patty has been an instrumental part of my life over the last nine years would be an understatement. She has been a HUGE part of my spiritual wellness. Patty has empowered me to understand that I am connected to something greater than myself. We have had quite a few “marathon conversations” over the last nine years and I think it’s accurate to say, over time my thinking shifted… and once it all changed, there was no going back to before.

WALKING IN AWARENESS, finding meaning and purpose in my life, has opened doors I don’t think would ever have opened. I have developed the power and capacity to make critical decisions and choices that have grounded me during periods of change. I have also developed resiliency and learned to thrive with grace and inner peace in the face of adversity. Having a spiritual element in my life has helped heal suffering from past experiences. The power is extraordinary.

The power of a shift in thinking occurs when something so revolutionary happens in your life that you have no choice but to reorganize your thoughts and reinterpret your experiences through this new lens. After meeting Pat, my life was divided into before and after. Try as you may, there’s no going back to the way things were before. I experienced an earthquake of the mind—a massive and momentous transformation of perspective that completely shook, jolted and changed how I approach the world. And all I can say is it’s pretty wonderful.

Some people spend a lifetime in pursuit of their purpose. That’s a shame.

I believe we are meant to do one thing with our life, and that is to awaken to the fire within which is the fuel of all life. In other words, do what makes your heart smile.

Patty & Dave’s book, When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister, is packed to the brim with existential truth and the kind of perspective and wisdom that will give rise to The Shift within you. The book will completely change your life and the way you look at it. It’s a reminder that life is what WE choose to make it. Second chances are real because you have the power to change your life’s direction no matter where you currently are. In Pat’s words EVERYONE HAS THE POWER…. even a housewife from Long Island.

About The Author

Yvonne Johansen, MS, CCC-SLP is the Lead speech-language pathologist at Citizens of the World Charter School in Hollywood, CA. She has over 30 years of experience as a clinical supervisor and Founder of Children’s Therapeutic Center, providing home based early intervention services through Regional Center & Early Head Start programs. Since the beginning of her career, Yvonne has enjoyed helping children with speech and language disorders, providing support and training to families and caregivers. Yvonne has experience working with a variety of populations within various settings in both New York and California.

Her passion for helping children coupled with her creativity, serves as the foundation for her educational toy company, SmartFelt Toys.

SmartFelt Toys makes award-winning, multi-sensory interactive playsets that build early language skills in young children. Beginning with My Little House and now with My Little Farm, My Little Zoo, and My Little Farm Bingo, these uniquely designed, classic toys provide children with the groundwork when building their receptive and expressive language skills.

Yvonne measures her success in how she can make a difference in the lives of children. SmartFelt Toys is an extension of that. Her dream is to one day manufacture SmartFelt in the United States, hiring a diverse workforce, empowering individuals with special needs in achieving their independence.

Yvonne was born and raised in New York. She obtained her Bachelor of Arts in Speech Pathology/Audiology at Marymount Manhattan College. Yvonne also holds a Master of Science Degree in Speech Pathology from Teachers College, Columbia University, NYC.

Discovering the Joy of Being Still and Other Thoughts on “When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister”

On August 3, 2021August 3, 2021 By Pat and DaveIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

By Judy Parker

Old Forge Pond, Old Forge,NY ©2020 by Kathleen Spatuzzi Photography and used with permission

I feel an overwhelming need to share just how much Dave Roberts’ and Patty Furino’s book When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister has impacted me. The effect is so profound that I have already sent copies to two dear people who have suffered loss. I plan to send more to others whom I believe will benefit from the message in this book. I believe in the healing power and comfort of this book.

Whether the loss is of a child as Dave and my brother experienced, loss of a mother, father, sibling, nephew, friend, or a beloved dog, the hurt and loneliness can become almost unbearable. This book gives me hope and strengthens my faith that death is not the end of our existence. The effect on my perspective has been far-reaching and I want others to know about the peace, comfort, and joyful expectations this book has brought me. With my existing faith I believed I would be reunited with loved ones in the future but now I know I don’t have to wait until then. I am learning that I can make my own connections with them. I am even discovering the joy of being still, which is something new for me. During those still moments more peace comes to me than when I rushed hither and yon for years, looking for the next great thing. Practices like Dave’s “Pieces of Me” provides more opportunity for the growth we all need to be truly happy.

I think about messages that I previously perceived as mere random occurrences. I now realize that life is not just a series of coincidences. I accept the fact that I can’t control a lot of life, and that’s ok. Instead of being fearful about what the future will bring, I now eagerly anticipate the gifts of presence from loved ones who have transitioned, in the here and now. Walking with spiritual awareness as advocated in this book allows me to not only be receptive to change but to actually look forward to what life can bring me. I know it won’t always be rosy, but I have faith that the good will far outweigh the bad. I can now envision a future filled with wonder and possibility.

Dave and Patty’s book helped me believe that we really don’t lose our loved ones but develop a new connection with them. I am so happy that I don’t have to abandon my core beliefs but can be empowered to develop a deeper understanding of life’s mysteries. What a marvelous thought that we can learn from so many different sources! In fact this book helped me learn to tap into many more resources than I could ever have imagined before. Who would have thought we could learn so much from Native Americans, animals, people who are put in our life path like Patty for Dave, and even random strangers whose paths cross ours. I love the fact that you don’t have to be a “gifted” individual to develop a higher awareness of life. We just need to believe .

Another great benefit from this book is that I now have a large reference list of material in which I can delve even deeper and, in the process, explore myriad avenues of thought. Neil Peart’s “healing road” to which the book refers is not just a healing road, but an elevation to a higher life experience. I see more clearly that life is a wonderful gift that keeps on giving if we are receptive and open to connecting to something greater than ourselves.

Dave and Patty express to the reader that our individual paths are not like anyone else’s and that there is no one “right” way to live. I believe this book has started me on what I hope is a never-ending road of discovery. I am excited about looking at the world with wider eyes and without fear of what I may find. I feel joy in reaching out to others and sharing my newfound knowledge. As Dave said, the power of community to work through grief is real. In the process of sharing in our community’s growth and supporting each other we can make this a better world for everyone. I am more attuned to opportunities to “help” others not just in big ways but even in simple acts like smiling. I want this to become a part of who I am.

My heartfelt thanks go to Dave and Patty for this book and for my new outlook on life and death.

About The Author

Judy’s first career was as a mathematics teacher at junior and senior high schools in Columbia ,South Carolina from August 1977 until January 1983. After teaching, she transitioned to the field of Information Technologies. From January 1983 until her retirement in May 2013, her positions included: insurance and real estate computer systems installation and troubleshooting, data systems analyst, instructor of insurance principles, system software, and computer systems problem management. She enjoyed her career and found immense satisfaction in her work.

She is divorced and the mother of a 34-year-old daughter. After retirement, Judy had a little difficulty in figuring out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. Because of her passion for the outdoors, she quickly decided to use her free time to hike in state and national parks. Judy is currently exploring the idea of buying an RV and “traveling this grand land of ours. “

8 Weeks Later

On May 1, 2021April 30, 2021 By Pat and DaveIn Personal GrowthLeave a comment

Reflections

It has been approximately two months since the book, When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister was released. Pat and I are pleased to have heard from grieving individuals who have taken comfort in the fact that they can be empowered to maintain continued bonds with their loved ones. One young woman told us that she and her mother were reading the book and planned to discuss it. Another parent told us that she was reading it together with her college age daughter. One of the outcomes that Pat and I hoped for was that the book would inspire multigenerational discussions about how the integration of psychology and spiritual practices could empower present and future generations to transcend life challenges. We had hoped that people would resonate with the message we are trying to convey.

Though we are humbled by the positive response to our book, thus far, we both had to confront our own fears and doubts(e.g. our shadow selves) during the writing process.

We’ve both had to look at the idea that our personal stories are now out there for colleagues, students and family to see. It has brought a sense of vulnerability to our private lives. In fact, prior to our book being published, I had a dream of being naked and alone on a dark city street. To me, that was the ultimate and symbolic representation of being vulnerable. Sharing my spiritually transformative experience after 10 years, was risky for me because of how my science based colleagues in academia would perceive my experience. But I hold my colleagues in high regard because they are very clear with what they believe. And there is room in this world for individuals with different beliefs to coexist peacefully. If we choose to witness rather than judge another person’s beliefs, we integrate certain aspects of them into our core belief system, if we so choose. So I cast any fear and doubt I had aside and “completed the mission” with Pat. Besides, I was never really in total control of the writing process, Spirit truly inspired the content of this book.

Empowerment and The Mississippi Freedom Trail

The work that I did with Pat was not traditional grief work. Pat empowered me to use the wisdom she shared through not only my daughter, but my other deceased ancestors and her wise spirit guides to facilitate the development of a clear and peaceful perspective that would help me look at the world differently. She helped me peck at the shadows of my past so I could find clarity in the present and create the future of my own creation. What Pat does is probably best described as Spiritual Counseling, and she treats it as a ministry. Her guidance helps individuals to achieve the greatest level of awareness and empowers them to develop a sense of self-efficacy or belief that their actions can have a positive impact on the world around them.

I had previously attempted to convince Pat of our need to write a book about my experience and what I learned during our marathon conversations. But Pat always resisted, because she was always very private, not wanting to share her level of awareness openly with the world, for fear of being misconstrued. But as was the case with me, Pat cast all of that doubt and fear aside because she also knew that Spirit was in control. Writing a book for Pat, was a HUGE accomplishment, because she was never one to sit still, let alone behind a computer typing hours upon hours and day after day. Pat has always wanted to be among the people, helping those who crossed her path, just as the Masters did. She wanted to do her work quietly.

Pat is ready to get back to work on ground with people. In May of this year, Pat will go back to Bryant’s Grocery in Money, Mississippi, to honor Emmett Till and his courage. She wants to create a second butterfly garden just as she did 10 years ago in response to the emotion that ran through her in the 24 hours following the ceremony at Bryant’s Grocery, the first marker on the Mississippi Freedom Trail.

There is a Season

What we continue to notice is that not only are our lives shifting and expanding, but also those of the generations of humans that follow us on this planet. Our children grew up with technology being introduced, this next generation is growing up with technology being the main focus of their education for an entire year. When the youngest thinkers reach their adolescent years there will be another generation that will bring evolution and change to the way we perceive our existence on this planet. As Pat has described it, these are the signs that we are in The Great Conjunction of The Aquarian Age. A time where peace, inclusivity and tolerance can be our guiding principles.

There is a 1960’s folk song written by Pete Seeger and performed by the Byrds, that came to mind as we wrote these last lines.

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
Pete Seeger

The Story Continues…

On March 1, 2021March 17, 2021 By Pat and DaveIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Double Rainbow Outside of Utica College 10/17/18

Welcome To Our World

First of all, Pat and I would like to welcome all of you to our new website, dedicated to our recently published book, When The Psychology Professor Met The Minister. Maybe you stopped by because you enjoyed reading our book and wanted to find out more about our story. Maybe you stopped by because you want to continue to embrace critical thinking skills to find or discover your truth in the context of our unique and transformative journey. Regardless of why you are here, we are glad you are here. So welcome!

Our plan is to use this space to share our life experiences, musings and other interesting events that have allowed our relationship to continue to evolve. We are also going to offer perspectives that will hopefully give those who read our blogs new ideas to navigate a world that presents with seemingly never ending challenges. We will write when the spirit fills us with awe for life and the teachings that can be discovered in every corner of the universe. Our blog is dedicated to the grieving parents who have graced both Pat and I with their stories and presence. Our blog is also dedicated to my students whose presence, validation and love give me a reason to teach and continue to grow every day. Our blog also gives Pat an opportunity to continue sharing her sacred path with both honor and integrity.

The Significance of March 1

On March 1st of this year, we went public with our story. Many of you already know about the significance of this date, as it relates to my personal story. On that day in 2003, my 18 year old daughter Jeannine died of a rare form cancer which turned my world upside down. That date is also significant for Pat, because her mother was born on 3/1/31. So our book was also released on her 90th birthday. We both chose that date so that we could recognize the importance of their significance in our lives. Honoring those both living and who have transitioned to a new existence is the key to remembering our roots, honoring our ancestors and developing relationships based on pure love. We honor those living and dead, by being tethered to our memories of them, and never forgetting their importance. Relationships are forever.

The Significance of Rainbows

You may wonder why we chose a rainbow as the featured image for our first blog. For starters, a rainbow is what first brought Pat and I together. We had initially met through a phone conversation on August 25,2010 when I helped her register for a grief conference in Oneida, New York. When we met at the conference, Pat told me she felt the presence of my daughter Jeannine when a brilliant rainbow appeared on Route 17 in Upstate New York approximately nine days later. Pat’s rainbow sighting was one in a series of serendipitous events that brought me to Long Island, where she guided me through an incredible spiritually transformative experience. That experience allowed me to see myself as more than a “bereaved parent.” Eventually I was able with Pat’s support and encouragement to embrace a perspective that allowed me to find peace with my daughter’s passing, and look at life, death and life after death differently. The rainbow in our picture was taken by Pat outside the Faculty Center building at Utica College prior to a presentation she made to my Death, Dying and Bereavement class. Six months later, Pat finally agreed to collaborate with me on a book about our story and our relationship.

We also want to leave you with this final thought :

“There is clarity and hope that can be found when you see beyond our existence through the prism of the rainbow, particularly during troubled times.”